So often in a divorce the animosity between adults involved trickles down to the children. The welfare of your children should be of utmost concern. Protecting the children from the mental impact of aggression between parents is crucial to the future. Make all attempts to parent the children together and allow the children to be aware of the combination of parenting concepts. Children are more often than not the victims in a divorce. Children love both parents and need to know though the parents cannot live together that they will at all cost work productively together to raise their children, supporting and informing each other in the many issues that will arise as children grow up. Parents are often not conscious of the effects their angry has upon the children. Children should not be used as pawns in a bitter situation, they did not get to pick their parents nor the circumstances they are involved in.
The many issue that children are involved in raising children is more easily handled when the parents can address them together. Children feel the stress and animosity between parents unwilling to work together. Though parents often try to avoid discussing matters with the children they still feel the tension. The children should be made to feel comfortable discussing matters with a parent. Children need to trust and love both parents but be able to openly express their feelings without reprimand. Even married couples will disagree frequently but all attempts should be made by both parents to spare the children any further grief.
Planning for the unexpected aides in avoiding a confrontation before it actually occurs. When parents are unable to get along for the welfare of the children, one parent must step up and do more than their part. At McDowell Chartered we put children first. McDowell Chartered serves every aspect of law that involves children, whether your children are minors or adults. Clients are encouraged and guided to be the better parent. For the welfare of the children all efforts should be used to not demean the other parent in front of the children. Your ex may be a total rogue but he or she is still the other parent of the children. Vent to a friend or counselor not to the susceptible children. Children will quickly learn and realize where they are comfortable and whom they can trust without efforts by one parent to demean the other. Regardless of any aggression a child feels toward a parent, the person is still their parent. The better parent need not belittle the child in attempts to gain love. Children are aware of and sense more than adults realize.
Being the better parent means making efforts to plan ahead to eliminate confrontations in front of the children. Make all efforts to have a schedule but try to be flexible if at all possible to special situations that arise in life and allow children to benefit from family, friends and new experiences. If your ex is uncooperative working out plans may be difficult and a strict schedule may be warranted. Children will feel alliances to a parent but this will be compounded by altercations in their presence. Avoid arguments in the presence of the children. If there are unavoidable conflicts made by the simple presence of your ex, make arrangements for a neutral party to be present during drop off or pick up times. Do not let your children see you lose your temper with your e if possible. Set a positive example and the children will be aware of our efforts to try to work with your ex. Children do figure it out. They know who is their “good guy” and who is not. Take the lead and be the better parent for your children’s sake. You know your children and know when they need extra attention or encouragement. Keep open communications between you and your children and you will benefit in the long run.
Preparation is a must in order to end the case on a good note in the best interest of the children. McDowell Chartered can provide legal counsel for you and your children. At a reduced rate for the initial consultation we recognize your needs and provide honest advice concerning you case. Contact McDowell Chartered at (613) 269-0746 to receive prompt answers to any questions you may have.
